MotherOfDragons_

foodtrucker:

when your ear finally unpops and everything is in HD and you start hearing things you’ve never heard before

the-vashta-nerada:

i’ve got some kind of allergic reaction going on and my face is breaking out in a bad rash and my mom is freaking out and wants to take me to the ER and my dad was like “let’s not make any rash decisions” and we high fived and now my mom is yelling at us

youngspiritofsin:

if you can’t laugh during sex, you might not be doing it with the right person

foodtrucker:

i’m like an iphone i just lose energy without doing anything

katara:

earthnation:

earthnation:

what did one cell say to his sister cell that stepped on his toe

mitosis

i want to die 

totiki:

4 8 15 16 23 42

My boyfriends dads family is here and this one lady is like “I don’t eat no seafood. Ugh. Especially bugs that eat mud….one time we went to Tennessee and their were rednecks…” And best part. She’s a legit redneck honkie. One time she ate shrimp dip not knowing what it was and threw up when someone told her. lol

avengedatthedisco:

how do people even fucking sleep with night lights oh god my room needs to be as dark as my soul

mishaoverlord:

ex-cuse-u:

i was browsing through ellen degeneres’ youtube videos and when i was watching her interview segments i noticed a trend where she keeps the comments enabled for all of her adult interviews but when she has a child on the show she disables any of the comments to protect the child from any bullying or negative feedback and that is why she and her team of producers are incredible

shiphassailed:

when your internet isnt really working well and your whole dash is just blank squares and you still scroll through it attentively

i’m glad we don’t have To hunt for our food any more.. i don’t even know where Sandwiches live

thedramaticsneeze:

hoshigumayuugi:

i actually like being up early i just don’t like getting up early

YOU  PUT THIS IN WORDS

nyozeka:

i hope my first child is a dragon

fuckyeahgirlcrush:

every time I listen to Florence + the Machine I turn into a literal meadow dwelling nymph who wears raindrops as hats and sunbathes on a lilypad

hair-old-styles:

harrystyies:

What if oxygen is poisonous and it just takes 75-100 years to kill us?

My science teacher said he thinks that’s true actually